Considerate or Condescending?

I'm leaving my little family for a little over 24 hours tomorrow and I will be at a far away location approximately 3 miles up the street. I'll be leaving my kids in the care of their very competent, very involved father who was kind enough to take the day off on Friday. The same man who was smart enough to marry me (however,not without some temporary lapses of intelligence and doubts):), who manages to provide for a family of 6 and 1/2, who excels at his job, etc. So why did I trade carpool days so as not to leave that to him? Why will I make sure I get the kids dressed before I go or at least lay out clothes (think flip-flops with socks and paper shorts, etc.)? Why have I spent most of this morning helping Nate get his homework done early so that it will all be signed and ready and in his backpack ready for tomorrow afternoon? I will refrain from making a dinner ahead of time for them, but I did consider it. I'm telling myself that I'm just trying to make things easier for him, but if you were him would you be insulted? For the record, these things do not insult Brennan. He never minds me making life easier for him whether it's out of consideration or just plain control freakiness.

Weekend Update

We had a really nice weekend. Friday night Anna had a party so the rest of us watched a movie together at home. Saturday we got some things done and then that night my parents took the three big kids along with some of their cousins to a local college production of Peter Pan. The kids LOVED the play and I am so grateful my children are getting exposure to so many plays and musicals due in large part to my parents. Brennan and Ben and I had a really nice time shopping for a couch and grabbing a bite to eat. It was so much fun having Ben all to ourselves, he was such a happy, good-natured companion. Sunday we made it to church semi on-time and Nate even walked into primary by himself without any tears. Yay!!! Then we joined some of my family for our monthly dinner at my parents'. All in all, a great weekend.

Brennan almost never gets embarrassed, but last night my Mom was praising him. He nervously kicked her rug for a minute and then kind of sheepishly said, "Yeah, I really don't want to talk about it." and then laughed awkwardly. It was so funny and cute. My verbose family is just too much for him sometimes :). We love Brennan.

It's really strange to have Anna be getting a real social life. It seems like 4 out of the last 6 weekends she's had some kind of party on Friday night. There were a couple of parties that were supposed to go until 10pm!!! I have to remind myself that she's not 5 anymore. I told her that we may not find out the gender of our baby when we have the ultrasound and it's KILLING her. She brings it up almost everyday and begs us to find out. We love Anna.

Abigail was telling me about a friend of hers that has $100. I said, "Wow, how did she get that much money?" "I don't know, I guess her parents don't forget to pay her her allowance every week." Ouch. Poor girl, I did remember to pay her this week. :) We love Abby.

Nate got a little CTR ring from church and wears it constantly. For some reason, I think it's the cutest thing ever on him and I love watching his little hands do things with that ring on. He's been really obsessed with football lately and asking me when he can start playing. Then one night watching a game with Brennan he saw a guy break his leg. A few minutes later he said, "Mom, never mind I don't think I want to play football." Poor boy, he just doesn't have the luxury that most boys do of feeling invincible. We love Natey.

Last night Ben happened by the window and noticed it was snowing. His face lit up as he said, "Mom! It's snowing, Santa's going to come and bring me presents!!!" He was so excited I hated to explain that Santa would be coming in just 11 short months. We love Benny.

Where Has the Week Gone?

Oh yeah, here's where my week went:

It's about 600 pages and I must admit after I read the intro I was having a hard time getting excited about reading that huge a book all about suffering and revenge. However, after I got past the first little bit, I was completely hooked and couldn't put it down. I finished Thursday night and then spent the next few days paying for neglecting everything else. I love a good read though, and the catch-up was well worth it.

So, on to the rest of our week. We had such a nice little break with the kids out of school on Monday and Tuesday it was great. Monday morning we woke up and met my parents and Macy and Liza and their kids for breakfast. Afterwards we went to Liza's and had a nice visit while the kids played. I love those spontaneous low-key get-togethers. Thanks for making it happen, Dad!

Tuesday I woke up feeling terrible so I put Anna in charge and went back to bed. She did a fabulous job of entertaining all the kids and I got some wonderful sleep and felt much better. They had a great time playing and staying in their jammies most of the day. It was so nice not to have to rush around doing the school thing. I love those days when they really get to interact and just play and be kids.

Friday my angel mother came over to be my personal cleaning lady. She knew how crummy I've felt and that I was discouraged with not having the energy to keep up with my house lately so showed up and worked miracles for several hours. I can't tell you what a difference she made in that time and it was so nice to get a jump start.

Thank goodness my Mom came that day because it had been a rough one. It was my one day I didn't have to drive anyone to school except that Anna was running late so I had to send the carpool without her and drive her myself. Then Nate refused to get ready for his afternoon Kindergarten when he was supposed to and therefore missed his carpool. My Mom kindly took him for me. One of the very most frustrating things for me is putting so much energy into getting my kids where they need to be when they need to be there but in the end having no real control over making it happen. Deep breath. I know, it's life, but it kills me. It had all the makings of a really bad day, but having someone love me enough to come make my can-opener sparkle and wash out the garbage can etc. put it all in perspective and brightened all our lives.

Okay, one more random thing, can anyone put my mind to ease that not if, but when there is an earthquake a child on the bottom bunk will not be squished to death?

Next Time I'm Driving

Anyone else a little unnerved by the fact that a few geese can take out both engines of a plane????? Seriously, all these years, I've been worried about things like hijackers and storms and really I should have been worried about geese? Doesn't it also strike anyone else a little odd that for all our advanced technology we haven't figured out a way to keep birds from being sucked into the engine? Weird.

Abigail Turns 8!!!

A happy girl from the beginning.

Always cute.

Now she's 8! Happy Birthday, Abby!

Today is Abby's birthday. I took this picture this morning after she opened her presents. She has been wanting eyeglasses so badly and even found some in the American Girl catalog for her doll and begged for those. She dragged me to the dollar store one day and wanted to buy some of those bifocals, but I wouldn't let her because I wasn't sure they'd be good for her eyes. She was devastated. With a tip from my sister, I found a pair of fake eyeglasses and knew they would make her birthday perfect. She could not be more thrilled.

Now let me wax sentimental about this sweet daughter of ours. Abby plays such an important function in our home. She is my go-to girl, she's totally dialed in and so helpful. She's naturally very nurturing and so takes great care of her younger brothers. She takes rules seriously and tries her hardest to be obedient. She's emotional, sometimes even volatile, but always the first to be sorry when she knows she's gone too far.

More than all she does for each of us, she's a unique fun girl who we all love to be around. She's full of contradictions. She can be extremely shy or the life of the party. She is hilarious and can have us all laughing with her wit and funny observations or she can be quite sober and thoughtful. One of the things those who know her best often observe is that she has wisdom beyond her years. I can't tell you how often I've overheard her boiling something pretty profound and advanced down so simply and sweetly to a sibling or friend or even Brennan or me. When the girls were probably about 3 and 5 they were playing a game. It wasn't going Anna's way and she was getting worked up into a full blown tantrum. Abby watched for a moment and and then said, "It's not that hawd (hard), Anna. It's dus (just) a game." She also has a natural sense of tact and can say things directly without being blunt or offensive. My Dad's favorite Abby story is when she was probably about 3 or 4 and we were all at my parents' house eating dinner. I can't remember for sure, but I think Abby was wanting something we had told her no on several times. She spoke up again and addressed my Dad, but Brennan had had it and came down on her for asking again. She let him say his piece and then politely, but assertively said, "Axowey (actually), Dad, I wasn't talking to you."

One day at a random little bookstore I found these little prints with a name and it's meaning. They were exactly like the ones my mom had given each of my siblings and me when we were young. I felt so lucky when I actually found each of my kids' names plus Benjamin (this was before he was born) because I knew I would have a Ben someday. Anyway, Abigail's says "Source of Joy" That, my friends, sums it perfectly up. We can't even begin to express our love and gratitude for this amazing spirit that resides in our little 8 year old Abigail Jo. We love Abby!

Photo Update

Monday night we went to my brother's house for a great joint Family Home Evening with my parents and sister and her kids. Ryan taught a great lesson about how Heavenly Father wants us to be happy and how we are happy when we are doing right. They then divided us up into three groups and each group had a topic like, "I am happy when I obey" and we created and performed a puppet show. It was so cute. Then we had a yummy treat and stayed way past the kids' bedtimes. Good times.





The next photos are all from yesterday. Anna had her friend, Chloe, over and Abby had her friend, Paige, here. Anna and Chloe quickly got settled into the art room where whenever I walked in they would hide what they were doing. I told them that wasn't inspiring a great deal of confidence in me, but they quickly reassured me that they were just making a surprise for me. A little while later they brought me these:

These are little birth announcements they made, one for a girl, one for a boy.

Anna made this girl name list.

Chloe made this boy name one.

They know we're struggling with names, so they came up with these lists to help us out. Very sweet.

After they finished their lists, they then enlisted Abby and Paige as models and they each created an outfit for each of their models and then, of course, had a fashion show.

The models working it.

I know I post a lot about the things my kids make. It's because I think they are geniuses and way more artistic than anybody else's children. I promise I don't really think that, okay maybe a little. These are just the types of things I want documented because I think it will be so much fun for them to look back at what they did at this age.

Update

I'm sure many of you are dying with suspense to know if Brennan won his work contest. YES, he did!!!! That means we get to go on a trip on the company - woo hoo! Thank you so much company, what a great contest. Brennan is so happy, he worked really hard and knows he was really blessed. My mom kept asking if we knew if he'd won yet and mentioned that she was praying for him. Those poor other guys didn't stand a chance with my Mom's prayers in the mix. We love Brennan!

I'm finally feeling a little better and am so grateful to feel like myself again, even my very flawed self! With each of my pregnancies along with the excitement, anticipation and joy comes a little mourning period for the current baby. Maybe this is universal, maybe I'm just really strange I don't know, but I have a bit of sadness and tenderness for my little Ben right now knowing his days of being my baby are numbered. I remember feeling the same way about Anna, Abby and Nate when I was expecting their younger sibling. Fortunately I strongly believe that giving them a sibling is pretty great compensation for being dethroned as the baby of the family. My siblings are among my greatest blessings which makes me happy for my kids to have another. For now, I'll enjoy every minute of baby Ben and when new baby comes we'll all make room and be thrilled to welcome him or her.

I have mentioned many times how sweet and helpful Anna is, but there is another role she has in our family which she takes very seriously - a big, gigantic, merciless tease. She thrives on hiding in closets and jumping out and scaring her little scaredy-pants siblings to near death. Every time she hears a scream she is overcome with satisfaction and pride. There are many other ways she loves to tease and torment her siblings. We are cracking down on her for these offences, even though I know it's part of the childishness that I love to see in her as she gets so old. She never intends to be cruel, but if you've heard my kids scream you'll understand why we are attempting to put a stop to this. She also has great sway over the kids because of all of them she is by far the best saver. She still has Halloween candy and is constantly using that to gain little advantages. For example if Nate will go and sit on the heater in his room and let her have the family room one she'll give him 2 pieces of candy. Oh dear. We love Anna.

Abigail will turn 8 years old on Friday. Today is her big VIP day at school where we bring in a poster all about her and a treat for each of classmates. She is SO EXCITED. I took her the store where she painstakingly picked the treat and the poster color. I'm supposed to share a funny story about her and I told her several which she carefully weighed and then selected the one she felt was best. I took her shopping to buy some new clothes with her birthday money from Grandpa John and Grandma Jamie and she new exactly what she wanted and exactly what she didn't want. When we got home Anna was so excited and immediately asked if she could borrow some of her brand new clothes. In typical generous Abby fashion she quickly and enthusiastically agreed. We love Abigail.

Brennan bought this little remote control helicopter that he has had to replace like 3 times because they keep breaking. Anyway, it's Nate's favorite thing in the entire world and he's earned Brennan's complete trust in his ability to play with it without ruining it. He is always on hand when any of the other kids use it and competently directs them to pull back or push up on the controls to save the helicopter from another disaster. He has honestly spent hours and hours with this toy. Oh, and today he informed me that he and Rex have a crush on my brother's future wife, Melissa. We love Nate.

Benjamin went with Brennan and the kids to a basketball game the other night and when they came home he immediately noticed the fire in the fireplace. One of his favorite things is to watch Brennan start a fire (we actually have to do more than turn on a switch). So when he noticed the fire and realized I had been the only one home he looked at me with surprise and said, "Mom, your build a fire all by yoursewf?" I think I went up like 10 notches in his book. Every time one of his siblings asks to play with a friend, Benny immediately asks, "Mom, can I play wif Abey?" Abe is his cousin that he loves. I usually say something like, "Maybe later, we'll have to see." but he usually remembers to follow up later saying, "So can I go to Abey's?" We love Benjamin.