Update

 

Anna has grown up so much this last year.  She hardly ever misses the bus now.  I love hearing the mad dash in the morning as she flies through the house looking for her homework or calculator and then busts out the door to high tail it to the bus stop.  I don’t think she ever makes it with time to spare, but as long as she makes it I’m happy.  She has a real sense of style and I love how well she knows herself and how her style reflects that.  I’ve been impressed with the outfits and hair styles she comes up with.   She’s also really made huge strides in fighting off her OCD tendencies -- a tender mercy we are so grateful for.  Although recently she babysat for us and when she changed Joshy’s very stinky diaper Abby had to be on perfume duty and keep spraying in front of Anna’s nose, while Anna did the dirty job.  She feels things deeply and as long as you’re not on the wrong side of those feelings, it’s fun to watch her get fired up about things.   I keep thinking that we need to get her involved in a cause, she’s ready to fight to the death.   I love that about her.  We love Anna.

Abigail is still very worried about the kidnapper that has been in nearby neighborhoods.  She’s trying very hard to be brave though.  She’s a sensitive soul.   Her worrying comes in handy though, because she keeps great track of Joshy.  It’s usually her or Ben who discovers him in danger and saves him.   She just told me today that she wants to get good at singing and then go on a show where she can win a million dollars and then use that for her mortgage.   When I asked her how she even knows about a mortgage she told me that I explained it to her once.  I told her that as long she and her husband work hard and don’t buy a bigger house than they need or can afford they wouldn’t have to worry.  “Yeah, but I still just don’t want to worry about a mortgage.”  Cracks me up.  She’s such a grown up.  We love Abby.

Nate had his highly anticipated animal fair yesterday.  We got to go and see all their hard work.  Each child made a poster about their animal and an art project.  We walked around and asked them all questions about their animal.  Nate has been looking forward to this for weeks.  If you need to know anything about a bobcat, he’s your guy.   I love watching him when he’s speaking earnestly about something.  He thinks faster than he can talk and you can practically see through his eyes all the thoughts tumbling around in his head.  His big brown eyes full of sincere intensity.  Yesterday when we were watching the BYU game, and it was do or die for the Cougars, he turned to us with a shy smirk and said, “I feel like I want to say a prayer for them.”  It was so cute.  We love Nathan.

Our sunshine boy has been a little uncharacteristically cloudy with occasional bursts of storminess lately.  He got so sick a few weeks ago and we still feel like he hasn’t quite bounced back all the way.   I also feel like, with my boys especially, the constraints of Winter kind of builds up in their bodies.  The arrival of Spring has been a little bit of a tease this year.  We can’t seem to have any kind of consistent warmth and nice days outside.  Hopefully when warmer weather comes and stays they can work all the winter out of their bodies.  The sunshine isn’t completely overshadowed though, whenever Ben surprises us with a trick or tidbit of knowledge and we ask where he learned it, he shrugs and says casually, “I just learned it up.”  Yesterday when we were leaving Nate’s animal fair where we had met Brennan, we walked out and Ben said, “I really love him”, referring to Brennan and then added, “and you.  That’s why we’ll be a family forever.”  We love Benjamin.

There are just no words to describe this Joshua of ours.  One minute he’s squawking demands at us and then the next winning our undying adoration by turning on the charm.   He’s always ready to be played with.  My parents came over one night and he just kept walking over to one of them and saying, “HI, Papa!”  “Hi, Mimi!”  Knowing he’s irresistible, eager to be picked up and tickled and loved.   It breaks my heart to think there are little ones who don’t take it for granted that everyone around them loves them.   He scared us to death, again, by once again getting on a little bike thing in our garage and down our terrifyingly steep driveway at what seemed like 75 mph.  He went all the way down on an angle right into the bottom of our railing on the side of our driveway.  We watched horrified, in the garage.  Fortunately the front of his little bike took most of the impact, but his head hit the railing after the bike did.  He had two big bumps, but they went away quickly and he was fine.  He must have a crew of guardian angels on him full time.   That scene replayed itself in my head at least 100 times.  I’m pretty sure I lost a few years of my life, but all things considered, a small price to pay.  We love Joshua.

Home Can Be a Heaven on Earth?

There are times I think I might go completely mad with the noise and chaos that surrounds me, then there are times I think I might explode from pure happiness.  It’s funny how I can go from one to the other in zero seconds flat.   The 6 people I live with are a lively bunch.  They’re opinionated, emotional, stubborn, passionate, loud – very loud, sensitive, and oh so affectionate.   The kids are getting old, and there seems to be a direct connection to their getting older and more conflicts.   It’s still not terrible, they really do get a long for the most part, but they’ve had several years now to become fully acquainted with every button they can push and the very predictable responses they will get from each button.   They’ve even developed a shorthand for pushing buttons, one of them can just give another a look or utter one little word and they both know exactly what was meant, and the “victim” never fails to give a more than satisfactory victim-y show.  Come to think of it, that part never gets abbreviated.

Obviously, the moments that they all get along are cherished.  Even though that often means a lot of messes and a lot of noise, it’s truly heartwarming.  Tonight the 5 of them played “tiger” which is some kind of tag game, and “leprechaun” which I have no idea how to play.  To hear Anna down to Joshy laughing wildly and running around together is something I treasure more and more.   Joshy is fairly new to the mix and Anna is already around/available less and less, so seeing them all together in a happy way is heavenly.

“But If Ye Are Prepared, Ye Shall Not Fear”

Last week we heard there was a man who made 3 kidnapping attempts in nearby neighborhoods.   All boys.  The same day I let my boys go to the park with some friends without me.   Nice.   My poor kids, mostly Abby and Nate, are kind of obsessed with this kidnapper.  Ben doesn’t seem to be too concerned and Anna is ok, but definitely a little creeped out.  Ben and Joshy are happily ignorant.

Last night for Family Home Evening I decided this was a good opportunity to review our safety rules/tips.  I started by having them read D&C 38:30 “But if ye are prepared, ye shall not fear.” and explained to them that after tonight, they would be armed with all the knowledge they needed, and that since they were prepared there was no need to fear.  We went over all the scenarios I could think of and talked about what the best thing to do would be in each one.  We even acted several out and then I had each of them practice yelling and screaming while I pretended to try and pull them away.  They loved that.  Joshua was fascinated by that whole scene and insisted on several turns.  He’d hold my hand and then scream, “HEP!”  It was so cute but kind of broke my heart he was completely unaware of the concept of fear and danger and evil.  My big 3 kids are totally aware, even in their sheltered, safe little life they feel fear all the time.  The contrast between them and the two little boys was stark and sad.  It also broke my heart that all too soon, those two will come to understand those concepts.  I hate that.

Poor little Abby just stared at me the whole time with pure terror in her eyes.  There hasn’t been a second since Friday night when she heard about it that she hasn’t worried about it.  Nate has talked about it a lot, but hasn’t seemed all that worried, still playing outside etc, but last night he broke down when he was going to bed.  He had come into our room the Sat. and Sun. nights after having bad dreams.  He told me last night his nightmares were about the kidnapper.  Clearly, he’s been terrified too, but wants to be brave.  It was gut-wrenching. 

I hate that my kids are so scared and that until they know this man is in jail, there’s not much I can do or say that will relieve their fear.   Abby was trying to understand why this man would want to kidnap.  She asked me if I thought he just wasn’t able to have kids and so he wanted to steal one to have.  She wondered why he didn’t just adopt a little boy.   All I had the heart to tell her was that someone who would stoop to kidnapping didn’t deserve to be able to adopt a child.   What a sad, sad world.

A Few Thoughts

When I was in Tennessee with my parents they met a very sweet couple (probably in their 50’s)who did the housekeeping at the motel we stayed in.  Actually, the wife works there, the husband just comes and helps her on the weekends when he’s off work so that they can get done earlier and they can enjoy their weekend together.   I can’t stop thinking about that and how sweet it is.

I have a major pet peeve with people who treat people like idiots.  My sister was telling me she heard she needed to go sign her oldest child up at the school because he’ll be in kindergarten next year.  She went in and the secretary was just so unhelpful and treated my sister like she was so stupid when she tried to ask some questions.  How in the world is a mother who has never had a child attend school supposed to know all the ins and outs of the system?  Why does she take so much pleasure in comparing her knowledge with Eliza’s, it’s HER JOB, SHE SHOULD KNOW ALL ABOUT IT and that doesn’t make someone who hasn’t worked there or had children go to school before IDIOTS!  Whew, glad I got that out.

I cannot stop thinking about a book I read, called “Sarah’s Key”.  It’s historical fiction about the holocaust.  Anything about the holocaust is off the charts upsetting, but this author had to go and add this terrible, awful thing to the story.  It’s not just something that described the horrors of what the nazi’s did, this is something she totally just made up and I’m mad at her.   There were so many actual tragedies and horrors from this time why did she have to make one up?  Plus she used a very bad word and I hate it when I have to hear or see that word.  I know someone who loves this book.   I’m anxious to go to bookclub tomorrow night and see if I’m crazy.  It’s very likely that I’m crazy and being completely irrational about this.  We’ll see.

If you haven’t seen “Waiting for Superman” go get it!  I heard about it when it first came out, limited release.  I was so sad because I knew I would never make it to the theatre.  The other day I noticed it at Redbox and was so excited to see it.  I admit I’ve never been a huge fan of unions, specifically teacher’s unions, but now, I’m afraid my head is going to explode when I think about it.  Also, I want the little girl named Daisy to come and live with us.  Her family seems super sweet, but maybe they would let her come live with me and come to our school. 

Update

I just sat down and should have warned everyone that this is kind of a permanent situation.  I won’t be moving for several hours.  Sundays are exhausting, aren’t they?  I can’t seem to figure out that whole day of rest thing.  We currently have church from 2 to 5 pm.  You know it’s going to be bad when you feel like it’s been the longest day of your life before you even get to church and therefore before you’ve had the pleasure of playing Sacrament meeting whack-a-mole.  5 heads bobbing up and down, 5 mouths talking too loudly and Brennan and I just sitting there waiting with our figurative clubs ready to bat the wiggles or noise back down.  Joshua just has no concept of quiet, none.   The good news is Sunday School felt like a date night and Relief Society was a dream because Joshy went to nursery!  Anyway, after church we came home and the girls (who had fasted) tore into anything they could get in their mouths while the boys took off their shirts and put mittens on for a few rounds of boxing (always a great Sabbath activity).  Joshua was still bitter about being dumped into nursery and decided he needed to be held by me and only me for the next hour while I also made dinner.  He also strongly disagreed with my stand on things like touching hot burners and putting hands in boiling water.    He wasn’t shy about expressing his opposing views.  We love Sundays.

Anna’s a good kid, and I’m really enjoying watching her grow up.   For young women’s the other night her leaders arranged to have 8 grandmas in the ward come speak to them.  They ate dinner with them and then each of the older women shared some of their wisdom with these 12 and 13 year old girls.  It really had an impact on Anna.  She let me read her journal entry about it and I was kind of blown away by her insights.   She was with 2 of her friends the other night and they were talking about 2 of their other friends who had been a little offish.  She suggested they invite them over too.  That makes me so happy.  We love Anna.

Abigail has really become determined that she will be a poet when she grows up.  Her friend’s grandpa is a poet and he came to talk to their class.  He suggested that they start reading as much poetry as they can if they want to write it.  She checked out a poetry book at school and devoured it.   Abby is so similar to me in so many ways that it always surprises me how much follow through she has.  I hope to be like her someday.  She sets her mind to something and there’s no stopping her.  I set my mind to something and there’s no need to stop me.   Anyway, everyday when she comes home from school she can’t wait to see Josh and can’t stop telling me how he’s the absolute cutest baby in the world.  We love Abby.

Here’s a little bedhead action from Nate.  It might be time for a haircut.  Nate keeps busy shooting baskets, playing his sports video games, and begging me to let him ride his bike in the street.  He likes to be busy and loves it when friends call him.  He is taking karate currently and loves it and just earned his yellow striped belt.  He has been working on an animal report for school, his animal is the bobact.  I cannot believe how long he can read about animals and how many of the facts he can retain and recall.   We love Nathan and his hair.

Benny takes full advantage of any good weather we get.  He’s always running around with our cute little neighbor kids, riding bikes, jumping on their tramp.   Friday night all three big kids had a late night at their friend’s houses so he was wondering what he was going to do.  I told him he got to have a late night with Brennan and me.  He wasn’t convinced he was getting a very good deal until I told him he could choose something to do with Brennan and something to do with me.  Brennan played a video game with him and I played one of his favorite little board games with him.  He was so thrilled.   We love Benjamin.

Doesn’t he look sweet?  He really is as long as no one gets any ideas that they might be running things.  If one of us challenges his authority, this is what he looks like:

Or he flops onto the floor, or he puts his arms on that little table and buries his head in them.

He’s been climbing up on chairs for awhile now and so we quickly learned not to have anything on the table.  Now he figured out how to move the chairs.  We’re in so much trouble.  He’s already dumped a whole thing of Benadryl out (thank goodness he chose to dump it rather than drink it!!!!), fish some forks out of the drawer and use them to dig the deodorant he found out of it’s container (again, thanks to his binkie he refrained from tasting it), and in his spare time do a little browsing in the pantry.

It’s a good thing we all happen to find him completely irresistible.  He’s talking more and more, but still relies quite a bit on his favorites, “Nooooo!” and “Goooo!”.  He can say “Dos-sey” (Joshy) and it’s cuter that I could ever describe.   We love Joshua.

Womens’ Conference IV

Yep, that time of year again!  This was our 4th annual Bell Women’s Conference.  Good times!!!!

Tiff, Kristen, Me, Eliza, Melanie, Allyson.  Front:  Mandolin, Mom and Liane

My aunt Allyson was in charge this year and did a fantastic job.  Thursday night all of the aunts gathered and 3 of them proved their hardcore-ness by staying up til 4 am!!!!  The next generation got to join in the fun the  next day.  Friday started with about 6 of us, Ally, Mel, Liane, Me, Lize and Mandolin at the temple.  It was so neat to be with these women and after our session we younger girls got to stand around with our aunts and ask them a thousand questions about the temple and what they’ve learned.  That meant the world to me and was a definite highlight. 
After the temple, we joined up with quite a few more (Mom, Becky, Kristin, Tammy, and  Jan) for lunch.  Good food, good company, good fun.
We finished lunch and drove to Ally’s house to unload our things and change our clothes.  We walked down to her church and had a fun surprise.  Ally’s friend was there to teach us some line dances.  Pretty creative idea, and a great workout.  Kristen, Tiff, Tasha, Megan, Diane and Sara joined us there.

my cousin, Mandolin

Tiff and Melanie taking a break

When we were too hot and exhausted to dance anymore, we shifted gears to play some very exciting games of volleyball.  Volleyball is a big deal in our family, it’s serious business and gets very intense.  My uncles and male cousins/brothers are notorious ball hogs so over the years a few of the women have opted out.  This time everyone played and hidden talents were revealed.  Liane, for instance, was our secret scoring weapon.  Eliza, got everything that came her way except when she and my mom couldn’t decide who’s ball it was and did a series of alternating short yells and startled movements. 

We left the church and went back to Ally’s for a great dinner where her husband, Mike aka Jeeves, waited on us most attentively.  Brittany and Ashley joined us there.  After dinner Allyson gave a beautiful presentation on “The Errand of Angels”.   Before we came we were each supposed to write a paragraph describing our personality.  We all put ours into a big bucket and then drew someone else’s out.  We took turns reading each paragraph and guessing who it was.  It was kind of amazing how quickly we knew, but was so much fun to hear everyone’s description of their own personality. 

Next Ally broke out the sparkling cider and fancy plastic goblets for a toast after which we settled in for a long night of chatting and laughing that went all too quickly.   We sprawled all over the basement floor and couches and chairs and mats.  We listened to Melanie describe her harrowing trip to Egypt right when the protests broke out.  We discussed our church callings, marriages, parenting, confidence, dating, personality types and everything in between.

I didn’t look at the clock when I finally dragged myself to bed.  I think it must have been around 3 or 4 (Eliza has reported it was 4:45).  Liane, Ally and Jan had gotten about 2 hours of sleep the night before but still stayed up with us.  Amazing, love them!

Most of us slept in the next morning til about 10 and then went up for a fabulous breakfast.  Some of us got ready and we all tidied up a bit and then started our service auction.  We were all supposed to come prepared with something kind of service to be auctioned off.  We wrote down our service and then we had a sheet with questions having to do with being angelic which we answered to see how much currency we’d have to spend in the auction (things like have you done your visiting teaching this month?  Did you read your scriptures yesterday? etc.).  Megan was our auctioneer and read off all the services we could bid on.  We had things like: crochet a scarf, bring family over for dinner, overnight babysitter, will plan and host a girls’ night, help set up a blog, teach how to use google calendar and docs, help organize a room, lunch and spa, art, sugar cookies, math tutoring session.  It was very difficult to choose.  I won the lunch and spa day from/with Jan! 

Finally, Mandolin shared her beautiful testimony about angels in our lives and beyond the veil.  It was the perfect ending to a perfect womens’ conference.   I feel so blessed to have so many exemplary women to learn from.  I know that sometimes the men in our lives roll their eyes that  these gatherings are just a big excuse to party, which it is in part, but few things motivate and inspire me like feeling understood and loved and like I’m in good company in my efforts as a disciple, wife and mother.   Thank you so much, Allyson, for all your hard work and your amazing hostess skills!  Thank you everyone who was there for such a great weekend!  Major kudos to Bren for holding down the fort 2 weekends in a row!

Some Squash

Have I mentioned that I'm obsessed with 18 month olds/2 year olds?  While I was in Tennessee DYING without my baby Squash whenever I called home Brennan or Anna would hold the phone to Joshy's ear and when I started talking to him he would just start giggling.  It was the cutest thing.  He didn't say one word, just laughed his manly laugh.  It kind of killed me.

Today Eliza and her kids were at our house and Joshy was loving baby Peter.  He wanted to hold him so I held Peter on Joshy's ample lap.  Once again Josh busted up in peals of pure delighted laughter, until he noticed my hand holding onto Peter.  Then in his firmest voice he pointed to my hand and said, "GO!".  He really hates it when we disobey him.

I mentioned I started taking voice lessons.  I practice in the kitchen while I load/unload the dishwasher or make dinner etc.  I have my sheet music and a little CD player in the kitchen so I can play my accompaniment track.  Today Joshua found a piece of blank lined paper, picked it up, walked into the kitchen and started singing.  Then he pointed and grunted at the CD player.  I turned it on for him and he was so pleased with himself.  Anna grabbed her camera, but the moment had pretty much passed.   The video does show about 10 seconds of him singing with chocolate chip cookie smeared all over his face.  He lost interest as soon as he saw the nuts on the table.  Oh, and the video ends with Anna stepping in the cookie dough she dropped while filming.  Some great FOOTage. 



Joshua Singing from Andrea W. on Vimeo.