Weekend

This is my favorite picture of my Grandma, isn't she beautiful? Friday was my Grandma's funeral. It was really so nice and perfectly her. Each of the talks were totally different but all so good. There was lots of music which is what my Grandma wanted. There was a gorgeous Chopin piano solo called "Raindrop Prelude". When my uncle called the woman who was going to play it she first thought they wanted her to play "Raindrops Keep Falling On My Head". Close call, we've all had a good laugh at that. The next musical number was a grandchildren choir I figure there were 42 of us up there with two cousins on missions and two of them too little to sing. We sang my Grandma's request "I Often Go Walking" and then "Love is Spoken Here". It was so powerful and emotional, but most of us managed to at least sing some of it. The final musical number was "O Divine Redeemer" sung by my brother, Braden, and cousin, Ashley. It was the perfect thing to end on, truly sublime.

Here are all her children, yes my aunt has 7 brothers and then had 5 sons.

A definite highlight of the weekend was having all my parents' grandkids together.

Hanging out at my parents' enjoying Bradens' family.

My oldest brother and his sweet family live in TN and we rarely see them. Their oldest kids are significantly older than the rest of the kids, but aside from their size, that was never apparent. They were so sweet and fun and interested in the little kids. Ben is obsessed with Spencer. All of my kids were EXTREMELY bitter when they had to say goodbye. One of my greatest joys is having my kids love their cousins so much.

Friday was kind of a marathon day. We got up and got ready and headed out for the viewing before the funeral. As we closed the casket my tender kids were so sad and emotional. It broke my heart, but I am so grateful I could look them in the eye and remind them how happy my Grandma is and that that was only her body taking a rest for now. Her spirit is joyfully reuniting with Grandpa and loved ones and our Savior.

After the funeral and the cemetery we went back to the church for lunch. Those poor Relief Society women had quite a crowd to feed, but did so wonderfully. After lunch we gathered at my grandparents' home for probably the last time and sat around sharing our memories of her. Then all of my siblings and our families and my parents gathered at my parents' home. We had dinner and played games. It was so nice just to be together. I loved that my older kids were old enough to play with us. I remember being "old enough" to learn those same games with my uncles and aunts and it was a huge deal.

Saturday, Christian, Rebecca, Oliver and Amelia went home. Later that day we gathered for a giant soccer game and then the pumpkin patch. They came home and each got to decorate their pumpkins. We left our kids, except for Joshy, at my parents' with Braden and Eliza's kids so that all the adults could go out to dinner. It was so much fun to enjoy a night out with some of my very favorite people.

Sunday Davis and Melissa left and after a nice Sunday dinner with Braden's family at mom and dad's we said goodbye to them.

We have so much to be grateful for.

Goodbye

Last Wednesday I got to go say goodbye to my Grandma June. She died on Friday. I'm so grateful I had that chance and it was so neat to gather at the hospital with so many of my aunts and uncles and cousins and siblings. I will always treasure that memory; however, given that I was a little emotionally overwhelmed and that there was quite a crowd I basically just said goodbye and that I loved her. As soon as I left the hospital and throughout these days since I've thought of so many other things I wish I would have said. So, here through my blog is my letter to my Grandma. My beloved Grandma who I'm missing so much but can't help but be happy for. She's been without Grandpa for a little over two years and I think they were the longest two years of her life. She and Grandpa met in the 7th grade (or was it 9th?) and they were just one of those couples that clearly belonged together. Even in my sadness it makes me smile to think of the two of them together again.

Dear Grandma,

Please give my love to Grandpa. If you happen to see my Mom's parents please give them my love as well. I miss you all so much! I know I'm blessed to have such amazing grandparents, I'm so sad not to have any of you here with us now.

One of my greatest joys is that most of my children will have memories of you. My Anna June will remember her namesake and have a clear picture of a great woman she has that connection with. They were so sad to hear you had moved on. We've loved having you around so much these past few years when you stayed with Mom and Dad or came for Sunday dinners or to our cousin camps in the summers. For as many kids as we always have running around at our get-togethers you seemed to always see them all. With 46 grand kids and 34 great grand kids it would be easy to for each little face to sort of blend together in a huge mass of craziness, but you somehow seemed to be able to see each one of us and understand who we were just by quietly interacting or watching. I was always surprised by your insight when you would tell me something you'd observed about my kids. I would love to be more like you in that way, maybe if I were quiet ever I would learn some things.

Brennan loves you and has always felt close to you and Grandpa. That too means the world to me. I'm so happy he was touched by your lives and goodness. He takes pride in being part of your company and that connection with both of you.

I would love to be like you if and when I ever grow up, Grandma. You are so refined without a hint of snobbishness. You managed to raise 8 amazing children and opened your home as foster parents I don't know how many times. You somehow also found time to develop your talents with music and literature and gardening. You were married to a man with a larger than life personality and you were happy to give him the spotlight, but you never disappeared. You are articulate and well read and up on current events and were happy to converse, but never needed to show off your knowledge. Mostly, you are a deeply spiritual, self-less, righteous woman who stayed on the path to the end. I hope to be so prepared to meet the Lord as you were. I love you so much and I'm so grateful to have your faithful example to cling to until we meet again. Mostly, I'm grateful that you'll be my Grandma forever.

Goodbye, Grandma. I love you!

A Good Day

Today was a good day. We're in one of those intense stages -- intensely joyful and intensely stressful. Don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong it's just the typical chaos that comes with a houseful of adorable, noisy, affectionate, emotional kids plus a newborn. It's the insanity of simultaneously helping 3 kids with homework, holding a sometimes fussy baby or even feeding baby, making dinner, and entertaining 3 year old. You know just that stuff that on any given day makes me feel like either Wonder Woman or a cranky old lady who just really needs a shower. Anyway, I don't take good days for granted.

It was a really cold morning so while Ben watched a show and Joshy slept I took a nice hot bath. Already off to a great start. Then as we drove to our weekly grocery shopping adventure Ben was very seriously discussing things with me in the cutest way ever. He was saying things that an adult would say, but he said them with his lisp and sweet little voice. When I told him my Grandma was sick he quickly asked, "Is she going to be okay?" For some reason that made me smile the rest of our drive.

At the store I let Ben choose a toy that he can have as soon as he's potty trained. He had a really hard time choosing, but finally did and I was really glad it wasn't the toy hunting rifle. We came home and Ben took a nap while I watched almost a whole movie while I fed Joshua. He's a slow eater, but sometimes it's nice. I didn't have to drive carpool. The kids came home happy and noisy. Anna got most of her homework done at school and went to piano this afternoon having practiced this week! Abby had her friend Paige over and they let Ben and Nate play hide and seek with them downstairs. Happily occupied children is truly a piece of heaven.

When Ben woke up I put his new toy up in the closet right where he can see it when he sits on his little toilet in the bathroom. We put his underwear on and he went potty several times sometimes in the toilet and sometimes not, but no big messes. You'd have thought he re-discovered the theory of relativity by his siblings' reactions to his successes. So cute. Ben was so proud of himself, couldn't wait to go tell the neighbors that he went potty in his toilet. I'm cautiously optimistic.

I knew what I was making for dinner and had it in the oven by 4:30 (UNbelievably rare). Most of the kids actually liked and ate dinner. Brennan came home and held the baby so I could get some things done. He made Joshua laugh so hard. I made a dent in the messes. We played our own version of charades for family home evening and that always cracks me up. Ben does the exact same thing every time he gets a turn which is to run around fake fighting an invisible foe and jumping and landing in really awesome poses. When we use up all the usual guesses and still don't get it, he'll say, "I'll give you a clue" and then tells us exactly who he's supposed to be. Brennan for reals acted out his favorite animal, the sloth, again (just in the game).

Now the noisy ones are all asleep and it's just Brennan, baby and me. It was a Good day.

Update

Wow, so much time and so little to say. Seriously, though I've tried to sit down and post many times and just haven't been able to string together coherent thoughts. I cannot guarantee that I've successfully overcome that, but I'm posting anyway.

With a newborn it seems Brennan and I do a lot of divide and conquer. The conquering part is good, but the divide part gets old. Last weekend my parents kindly babysat all the kids including Joshy. I never leave a newborn with a sitter and my parents know that so they always try to help once after we have a baby. It was so nice to sit by each other and actually have a conversation. I love Brennan.

Anna had a really neat adventure that I want her to post about, so hopefully that will be coming soon. I've been so impressed with her lately. She's been incredibly busy with homework, soccer, piano and ballet, but has had such a great attitude and really worked hard. We love Anna.

The other night we were coming home from my parents' house where my mom had done a big treasure hunt for the grandkids. I was telling my kids how blessed they are to have such great grandparents. They wholeheartedly agreed then Abby added, "I love Grandpa and Grandma so much and I would love them even if Grandpa wasn't famous and Grandma didn't give us treats." We love Abigail.

I was so worried about Nate transitioning to being at school all day long. In keeping with his habit of being totally unpredictable, he seems to be thriving. I think he just is so much happier when he's busy all day. He comes home happy and ready to get his chores done and play with a friend. He's gotten much more social and has also rediscovered his bike and loves to be outside every chance he gets. We love Nate.

Benjamin George is constantly making me smile. This was his get-up last Saturday. I'm pretty sure he was in those jammies all day, we didn't go anywhere so why not, right? Anyway, the way he was strutting around with his princess helmet and mis-matched gloves was killing me because I just knew in his mind he was the toughest biker dude EVER when he got on that big wheel of his. I keep being surprised at what a fabulous little companion he is. He's happy to entertain himself, but totally up for running errands or getting together with Abe and Belle. He's just a happy, sweet, really fun little guy. We love Benny.



Joshua is oh so adorable. Jan, I still don't know who he looks like. A lot of people say they see Brennan and Anna in him, but to me he's got his own look going on. This week he started giggling and none of us can get over it. He's so quick to smile, in fact every time I put him in his swing when he's still awake I'll go to check on him and there he is cooing and smiling at some invisible friend of his. It's the cutest thing. It does make me wonder who's hanging around here, but any friend of Joshua's from heaven is welcome here. Anyone who's had a baby knows exactly how I feel, but it's still frustrating not to be able to describe the feeling of complete joy he gives me. I love that he has the same effect on our whole family. We love Joshua.

Angels

This hasn't been my favorite week. I got a sinus/ear infection that gave me vertigo which made me nauseated. It's tricky bouncing or rocking a baby when your head is spinning when you're holding still let alone moving. I'm finally starting to feel better, but am still a little dizzy. The good news is:

Joshy and Benny have been angels. Joshua has never been more adorable, smiling and cooing, oh I can't get enough of him. Ben was so good natured to just play and watch shows with me while I laid around as much as I could.

One afternoon I stood up to go get Joshua and got hit with a wave of nausea. I knew I wasn't going to be able to ride that wave out so I set Joshy down on the ground and yelled for Anna and dashed to the bathroom. Anna quickly rescued Joshy from being "rescued" by Benny. She then grabbed the phone and called Brennan to tell him I was not in good shape. She knew he was supposed to work late that night but suggested he figure out a way to come home earlier. She then kept checking with me to see if she could get me anything.

Poor Brennan had a crazy busy day, but stayed home as long as he could and then did find a way to come home earlier than planned. My mom came to help me and my visiting teachers brought dinner yet again. I HATE being sick, but it has made me grateful for all the angels in my life, oh and for antibiotics.

Update

We went out to a balloon festival Friday night and had a really nice time.

such a pretty sight

This was definitely the highlight for the kids - sitting on top of the minivan.
Anna wasn't there instead we have Abby's friend, Paige.

This picture makes me so happy

Saturday we stuck close to home and watched some college football. Brennan kind of can't contain his excitement. For much of the day he was banished into our bedroom to watch so that I could watch something I wanted to watch when I was confined to the rocking chair holding Joshua. We all heard clapping, fake spitting, yelling and jumping up and down coming from the bedroom. Our kids thought it was hilarious to watch their relatively sane dad carrying on in such a way all by himself to the tv. We love Brennan.

Anna has been begging to go horseback riding for a long time now. One of her best friends has a horse that they keep at her Grandma's. Sadie's grandma was kind enough to let Anna tag a long with Sadie and let her ride. Anna was in heaven. I think she kind of belongs on a farm or ranch. Her dislike of germs doesn't seem to bother her when it has to do with animals. She also got to go to a play with my parents for her birthday date. She loved the play and loved having her grandparents all to herself. We love Anna.

The kids were discussing the movie "Jumanji" and Abigail could not for the life of her get that name down and kept calling it "Geometry". Now that would be an exciting movie. As evidence of Abby's sensitive and dramatic side I submit the following: the kids and I were discussing something Anna's friend had told her about a boy they know seeing his Grandpa's spirit. The kids all agreed that would be extremely creepy and I was trying to convince them that if it was someone you loved and had been close too it would be really neat. Suddenly Abby exclaimed with tears in her eyes, "Great!, now you've got me thinking about all the people we love who have died!" We love Abigail.

Nate seems very happy when he leaves for and comes home from school; however, whenever I ask how school was his reply is "Terrible!" I guess he feels it's not cool to like school. I'll take what I can get :) Last night we were all gathered round the tv watching a very important college football game. It was an extremely close and exciting game so Brennan was even more animated than usual. When a certain kicker kicked the ball out of bounds Brennan was irate with this poor young man and kept telling us what a stupid idiot this kicker was. Sweet Nate listened quietly and then said, "Dad, I'm sure he tried his very best." We love Nathan.

Ben took a nap with Brennan last weekend and when he woke up he turned to Brennan and said, "I'm going to go see Nate, he's WEELLY (really) funny." I love how much he loves his siblings and especially his big brother. Tonight we measured each of the kids and put their mark on the wall. They were all so excited and decided they also wanted to be weighed. I said, "Benny, go see how much you weigh" to which he replied, "I already did -- furty-six cents!" I've had such a renewed affection for this little boy since the big kids have been at school all day. He is truly just a delightful little companion.

Joshua is two months old today. Happy Birthday, baby love! There are days he's fussy and I do little other than rock him and sometimes I feel like I would give anything to just get something productive done. It's funny though because whenever I do have extended periods without holding him I miss him terribly. He's completely won me over and I just wish I could bottle his smiles and cooing so I could keep them forever.

A Special Day!

Today was a really special day, it was my Dad's swearing in as Lt. Governor. Brennan was out of town so couldn't be there and although I knew it would be interesting I decided this was something I didn't want my kids to miss. As I was getting ready this morning Ben must have sensed the importance of the occasion and wanted to change his look up a little bit. So with the help of my make-up this is what he came up with:






I'm really grateful I don't use waterproof mascara. We got him cleaned up, loaded him and Joshua into the car, picked up the big kids from school, and headed to the Capital. With my trusty (and ENORMOUS) stroller and a couple of fabulous staff members we got parked and guided through lots of tunnels and hallways to the Senate floor where they my Dad's nomination was approved. It was really neat to be there and hear all the nice things so many people had to say. I actually managed to hear most of it while bouncing the baby, or handing him off to my aunt to go help Eliza contain the perfect storm of Ben, Abe and Belle at nap time. They were less than impressed with the event, but very interested in storming the President of the Senate's office with a candy bowl in it.

Me and the 4 big kids on the Senate floor

After the confirmation we moved up to the Gold room for the actual swearing in. It was packed and mostly with cameras. My girls represented our family while I stood near the door. A dear sweet friend took Ben and Abe and Nate and another aunt took Joshy for me so I could hear. It takes a village. Seriously, between my sister and me and our total of 7 kids we had about 8 angels of mercy plus some staffers helping us at various times throughout the day.

My Mom and Dad

My sister, Eliza, Joshua, Me, Mom, Dad and my brother, Ryan

Abby, Belle, Anna, Benny, Nate and Abe

It was exhausting, but such a privilege to be there. This whole experience has given me even more respect for our system of government, our country, our state, and helpful people. We're truly blessed. For a much more entertaining version of this day check my sister's post out here.

A pretty neat moment

Dad's Swearing In from Andrea W. on Vimeo.