Goodbye

Last Wednesday I got to go say goodbye to my Grandma June. She died on Friday. I'm so grateful I had that chance and it was so neat to gather at the hospital with so many of my aunts and uncles and cousins and siblings. I will always treasure that memory; however, given that I was a little emotionally overwhelmed and that there was quite a crowd I basically just said goodbye and that I loved her. As soon as I left the hospital and throughout these days since I've thought of so many other things I wish I would have said. So, here through my blog is my letter to my Grandma. My beloved Grandma who I'm missing so much but can't help but be happy for. She's been without Grandpa for a little over two years and I think they were the longest two years of her life. She and Grandpa met in the 7th grade (or was it 9th?) and they were just one of those couples that clearly belonged together. Even in my sadness it makes me smile to think of the two of them together again.

Dear Grandma,

Please give my love to Grandpa. If you happen to see my Mom's parents please give them my love as well. I miss you all so much! I know I'm blessed to have such amazing grandparents, I'm so sad not to have any of you here with us now.

One of my greatest joys is that most of my children will have memories of you. My Anna June will remember her namesake and have a clear picture of a great woman she has that connection with. They were so sad to hear you had moved on. We've loved having you around so much these past few years when you stayed with Mom and Dad or came for Sunday dinners or to our cousin camps in the summers. For as many kids as we always have running around at our get-togethers you seemed to always see them all. With 46 grand kids and 34 great grand kids it would be easy to for each little face to sort of blend together in a huge mass of craziness, but you somehow seemed to be able to see each one of us and understand who we were just by quietly interacting or watching. I was always surprised by your insight when you would tell me something you'd observed about my kids. I would love to be more like you in that way, maybe if I were quiet ever I would learn some things.

Brennan loves you and has always felt close to you and Grandpa. That too means the world to me. I'm so happy he was touched by your lives and goodness. He takes pride in being part of your company and that connection with both of you.

I would love to be like you if and when I ever grow up, Grandma. You are so refined without a hint of snobbishness. You managed to raise 8 amazing children and opened your home as foster parents I don't know how many times. You somehow also found time to develop your talents with music and literature and gardening. You were married to a man with a larger than life personality and you were happy to give him the spotlight, but you never disappeared. You are articulate and well read and up on current events and were happy to converse, but never needed to show off your knowledge. Mostly, you are a deeply spiritual, self-less, righteous woman who stayed on the path to the end. I hope to be so prepared to meet the Lord as you were. I love you so much and I'm so grateful to have your faithful example to cling to until we meet again. Mostly, I'm grateful that you'll be my Grandma forever.

Goodbye, Grandma. I love you!