What to do?

Last night my friend and neighbor called to remind us that Nate would be starting swim lessons this morning with her. As soon as I hung up I told Nate, who was thrilled. He cooperatively made his bed and tidied his room this morning so he could get ready for his swimming lessons. I left the girls with Benny asleep and drove down the hill to drop Nate off for his lesson. I hopped out of the car and opened Nate's door. "Acshuwee -- I don't want to go," he said, as he cowered into the back corner of the van. I had been afraid of this very thing. "Nate, you don't have to get in the water, you can just sit and watch, let's just go see who's in your class and talk to your teacher." No go. I talked, and pleaded, and begged, and lectured, and even tried to just drag him out of the car, but he started crying so hard and seemed so genuinely terrified I couldn't do it (plus I didn't want scare the other kids). So, what did I do? I went over and told my friend not to wait and that we'd try again tomorrow, got in my car, drove home and cried.

Why did I cry you ask? Well, let's see....here are the possibilities:

1. I'm a still little emotionally unstable after a bittersweet weekend of my Grandpa's viewing and funeral.

2. We paid a lot of money and stood in a very long line for these lessons.

3. I know that Nate would love it if he would just try it.

4. A nagging thought that I am completely inept as a mother because I couldn't resolve the problem.

5. A rising panic that my sweet, talented, wonderful little boy will never experience anything or learn anything ever in his whole entire life because he is plagued by anxiety, and that pre-school this fall might be an adventure.

I know I probably over reacted a teensy bit, but I'm worried because that's what I do. Brennan's going to go with him and stay with him tomorrow so we'll see how that goes. Any other suggestions?