Andrea Finally Goes to Europe, Paris, II

April 13, 2014

Seriously, I think that was my best night of sleep ever, and after that Jet lag was not an issue.  Day two in Paris was Sunday.  We tried to get to church but overslept and then couldn't find a way out there in time.   Brennan and I decided we wanted to out to Versailles, but my parents had already been on a previous trip and decided to try to go see Monet's gardens, so we went our separate ways.  I think Brennan and I caught a train out to Versailles, it was probably an hour or so out of Paris.  We arrived in the beautiful little town and walked a few blocks to the Palace.  Wow.  The Palace is beyond what I ever could have imagined, it is massive and ornate and massive.   It was so so crowded, and the line to go inside would have taken several hours so we decided to do the grounds tour.  I'm so glad, someday I would love to see inside, but walking the lovely grounds all day was the perfect way to spend a Sunday in France.

Here is Brennan in front of the gigantic palace.

I wish I knew how many hundreds of acres the grounds were.  It went on forever, and at the very bottom or end of the palace grounds there was a park with the little river that ran through the palace grounds with cute little cafe's and shops.  We probably spent 3 or 4 hours wandering through the grounds.  There was one huge, corridor with lawn or water in the middle that ran down as far as you could see and then off to the sides were mazes of endless little forest paths leading to little courtyards with fountains or pools and lakes.  Now there are also little shops and cafes and restrooms scattered throughout the grounds.

This is part of the back of the palace

When your back is to the palace, this is what you see

Here is one of hundreds of little fountain courtyards

Here's our Palace of Versailles Selfie

It was all so beautiful and so green.  There weren't flowers, but the endless green and hundreds of water features were just so serenely beautiful.  It was a chilly day, but never rained.  We ate a yummy sandwich of just ham and swiss or maybe provolone cheese on a huge baguette, so simple and straightforward, but so good and filling.  We also ordered hot chocolate at one the park cafes and sat under the heater on the patio enjoying the warmth.

After wandering there for several hours, we had heard about Marie Antoinette's farm nearby and decided to walk over there.  It was one of the loveliest walks I have ever taken.  We followed a little path from the Palace grounds to her farm through rustic little pastures, it was breathtaking!

I wish I had a picture of when we finally got to the farm.  The whole property was surrounded by a stone fence and even a dry moat.  We had walked for hours now and miles and miles and our feet were tired and aching.  We found a gate and entrance to the farm only to find it closed, there people inside, and therefore obviously another entrance but it seems it was on the other side of the huge property.  We saw some young adults jump the mote and climb a little part of the wall, so Brennan decided we were following suit.  I hated to do it, but I hated the thought of walking several more miles to find an official entrance even more, so down moat we went and up the steep bank and over the wall, the group of young adults were so nice and kindly helped me up.  We finally made it in and loved walking around the beautiful country farm with it's quaint little buildings and pastures.

We finally made found our way back to the Palace and then back to the train station where we caught our ride back to Paris.  We figured we walked at least 8-10 miles.  It felt good to sit for a while.  When we arrived back in Paris, I think my parents were napping so we must have caught a tour bus over to the Champs-Elysees where we explored some of the shops and looked for a restaurant that Brennan ate at years before when he found french fries with a special kind of sauce.  We wanted some real French cuisine, but most of the restaurants were Italian or German or American!  We finally found a little spot and managed to get seated.  Fortunately they had English menus, but our waitress didn't speak any English.  We had a couple of mis-communications but finally got our food.  I don't even remember what I had, but I remember liking it and more importantly Brennan found his sauce!  It seems like after that we met my parents somewhere for dessert perhaps and then back to our hotel for another well-earned sound sleep.

Andrea Finally Goes to Europe, Paris

We left on a Friday morning, April 11th early in the morning. If I remember correctly, Josh took us to the airport. I think we met my parents there. I was nervous to fly so far and for such a long time. We boarded our plane, it was a direct flight to Paris. I think it took about 10 hours. It was a really long 10 hours, and I don't think I slept more than a few minutes here and there. I was so happy to get off that plane, and I couldn't believe I was actually in Paris, France! We bustled around the airport, and managed to get a ride to our hotel. It was a quaint little place with tiny little rooms, but a big comfy bed. We were all exhausted and it was now Saturday morning in Paris, so we agreed we'd take a nap for an hour and then head out to sight see. We only had two days in Paris so as painful as it was to force ourselves out of bed, we did it and were off to see the City of Love!

Our Paris Hotel

Here's our fancy room, basically four walls and a little room between them and the walls :)

Our crazy neighbors, a stone's throw away (he actually threw an orange into our room, I believe ;))

With maps in hand, we went straight for the tour bus office. The bus was the perfect way to see a lot in a short amount of time which is just what we needed. I was so tired, I was having a hard time staying coherent, but everything around me was incredible. I loved everything I saw, every corner was charming. Everything was so old, but still so sturdy and functional and beautiful.. It was so fun to just drive the quaint tree-lined streets and take in all the sites.

Just a random, beautiful street from the bus ride

I believe the first place we stopped and got off the bus was at Notre Dame, it was amazing. We walked through it and marveled at it's massive, formidable presence. It was huge and so so impressive.

I still can't believe that's me in front Notre Dame de Paris!

After that we walked over to the Sainte-Chapelle, on a recommendation from Melissa. I am so grateful she told us about it, because I know we would have missed it, it's tucked away just a block or two away from Notre Dame. The Sainte-Chapelle (Holy Chapel) is in the process of renovations, but fortunately we were still able to go in and see the breathtaking stained glass.

There was panel after panel of beautiful detailed, biblical scenes that went on and on around the entire room. It was stunning.

We walked along the Siene River which was so thrilling and reminded me of scenes from "Charade" with Carey Grand and Audrey Hepburn.

Driving by the Louvre was another definite thrill, but kind of a painful one knowing we didn't have time to go in, someday I'll go back and spend hours and days in all the museums!

I was so tired, but it was all so amazing. It was all a little bit fuzzy in the moment because of jet lag, but it's really fuzzy now 10 months later. After the Louvre, our bus drove down the Champs-Élysées to the Arc de Triomphe and then to the Eiffel Tower. I know we got off at near the Eiffel Tower and walked down around the base. I decided the thought of going up was too much for me, but it was beautiful and shockingly huge. It was all beautiful and awe-inspiring and exhausting.

After the Eiffel Tower, we caught a bus back towards our hotel and walked around looking for a dinner spot. We found a quaint little patisserie and were grateful to sit and eat. Our waitress was very nice and spoke fairly good English which was a welcome change. I was so surprised how much language was an issue, it was a frustrating obstacle. Another downside was how many people smoked. As we walked the beautiful streets there was a constant and potent smell of smoke everywhere. I couldn't believe the always progressive and fashionable Parisians were so behind on the coolness of smoking!  Anyway, we enjoyed a lovely meal and by the time we finished we were all thoroughly pooped! We tiredly stumbled back to our hotel for the best night's sleep I think I've ever had.

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Andrea Finally Goes to Europe!

When Brennan graduated from college, he went with the Noordas on a two-month vacation to Europe. His Mom and John gave him the airfare as his graduation gift and then he scraped together his savings and managed to live there
for two months. He didn't do in luxury, he stayed in hostels and train stations and ate on a budget, but he managed to see a huge chunk of that beautiful continent. This was after he had lived in Ireland for two years on his mission. I, on the other hand had only been to Mexico, and Hawaii and Peurto Rico outside the continental United States. We had always hoped to be able to go to Ireland together for our 10 year anniversarry, and then that came and went, maybe 15, maybe 20th.

Then, last spring Davis announced that he and Melissa and Bea would be moving to London for a few months. Brennan had predicted that would happen and told me that would be our chance because it would help offset the expense to have somewhere free to stay. My heart sunk when I heard Davis' timeframe, they would be there from March to June. I think we probably heard about this late February. I knew there was no way. There was no time to save up and money was tight, Brennan was under a lot of stress not to mention the last few months of school are always intense full of programs, sports and concerts. The timing was all wrong. But, every time I wrote it off, somehow it came up again. Brennan and I talked about it, but usually one of us saying we should go for it and the other one was reminding the other how impossible it would be. Then, my Dad talked to me about going with them. I told him how much we'd love that but that it just wasn't going to work. Ryan and Macy were going to go, but later along with a visit to her parents who are serving a mission in Manchester, England. Chris and Rebecca, Josh and Eliza and Braden and Mere weren't in a position to go. They felt like we were the ones to go with them, and even talked about squeezing Ireland in too. A few days later, my Mom mentioned she and my Dad were praying that we would be able go with them. I called Brennan and told him our fate was sealed, I knew that if Mom and Dad were praying, things would happen. Sure enough, a few days later Brennan called me from St. George. Sadly, his step-dad had passed away and he went to be with his Mom and help her get ready for the funeral. He also helped her find and access all of the bank accounts and information. John had a credit card and Jamie asked Brennan to cancel it. He suggested they check to see if there were any rewards or points on it first. Sure enough, there was a huge amount of reward points on the card. He had mentioned our crazy Europe scheme to her and when they found these points she so generously told him to use them for our airfare. Those prayers were working.

We knew this was too good an opportunity to pass up. We settled in on the dates and then had the huge obstacle of what to do with our kids. We would be gone for 10 days. Sweet Eliza called me one night and told me Josh told her to tell us they would come stay with our kids. She had three young, busy kids of her own and was pregnant with her 4th, but she is probably the person my kids are most comfortable with after Brennan and me. We left on a Friday and got back on a Monday night. We arranged for my cousin, Lauren to come stay with the kids the first weekend and then Josh and Eliza stayed here during the whole week, she cooked and cleaned and kept track of 8 kids all while pregnant, she is a saint! Then Jamie came up Friday afternoon and had them the rest of the time. It was perfect. We hadn't left the kids for 5 years, and we knew it would be a stretch for all of us. When we told the kids, they were all kind of a mess, they are all worriers and hate to be seperated. It was so hard to push them so far outside their comfort zones. It was hard for us to think about leaving them for so long, especially little Josh.

We had a lot to do to get ready, expediting passports and planning where were going to go and coordinating with my parents and Davis and Melissa, arranging carpools and rides to games and writing the longest note with details for our brave babysitters. It all came together though and on April 11, 2014, we headed out for the trip of a lifetime! What a blessing, I will forever be so grateful for the experiences we had. It was one of those things we all knew was a gift, a beautiful, custom-made gift for us from Heavenly Father and Jamie and Josh and Eliza and Davis and Melissa and Mom and Dad.


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Nate

Today I checked Nate out early for a dentist appointment, he was thrilled when he realized I wasn't going to force him to go back after his appointment. His appointment was at 1 and he was done by 1:30. I took him with me to the grocery store for a few things. He was so chatty and cute. When we were waiting at the dentist's office he told me we should adopt a baby girl. I think that's so cute that he loves little ones so much. He also chatted about his friends and what they do at recess and how sometimes they get a little heated when they're playing football and disagree. He talked about how it drives him crazy when some of them rage, and he starts to get bugged, but decides not to hurt their feelings so he uses his sense of humor to diffuse the situation. I loved hearing about this sweet boy of ours. I am so grateful for the gift I had to connect with Nate today. We love Nate.


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Connect

This year's word is "Connect". Connecting with Brennan feels more important than ever, and also more difficult than ever. This stage of life has brought stress and busy-ness like we've never had. Of course, there are wonderful things about this stage as well but it is easy to slip into parallel lives as spouses, so finding ways to stay connected seems especially important right now. Secondly, even though I am a stay-at-home mom and am often with my kids for long stretches of time that doesn't necessarily mean we are connecting, especially with the older kids. I also thought of my YW, I would love to be able to meaningfully connect with each of them.

Eliza taught a RS a few months ago about Spiritual Gifts, I think, and someone commented about knowing someone who had the gift of reflecting God's love. I want that gift, I want to be so connected with my Heavenly Father and Savior that I too can reflect that Love to those around me. If I could help each of my children and YW and really everyone feel how much they are loved, how perfectly and absolutely their Savior loves them, what more would they need?
I also need to connect to the enabling power of the Atonement. I need to overcome some weaknesses, now and I know the only way is through that specific connection. I hope for these things!



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Strength, Part III

So, after part II, you know where I’m coming from.   This has been a really, really slow process.   When Brennan’s blessing said that the desires of my heart would be given me, I was so happy.  I am interpreting that to mean, that I can finally make some actual physical progress towards being physically healthy and strong.  I know that it to do that really just takes eating well and exercising right?  So what’s the big deal?  Well, just that I can’t seem to make myself do those things.  I hate getting up early, I really don’t love exercising and I really do love sweets and bread.  I can do those things, for a while. 

After that blessing I was so happy and I knew the next step was to get guidance on how to do it.  I didn’t want to rely on the arm of flesh, I didn’t want to just jump in without help, without the enabling power of the Atonement.  I prayed and prayed to know how to go about it.  I tried forcing myself to exercise, trying different things, I also tried to eat better.  Somedays I did pretty well, and then somedays I didn’t.  So, I kept praying.  One day I was on Facebook and saw a link to a food blog that I never read, but I guess at some point I “liked” them on Fb.  The title of the post caught my attention immediately:

http://www.ourbestbites.com/2014/03/real-life-health-and-weight-loss/

I read it and I knew this was my answer, this was what I had been waiting for, my guidance. The co-author of the blog shared her weight loss story.  She had had a few kids and found herself significantly overweight.  She met a trainer and started weight training and watching her calorie intake with an app called My Fitness Pal.  That’s it!    Her approach was structured, but very doable and moderate.  It was perfect!  I knew this was my answer because it was strength training, and Strength is my word!  So, I went to the gym down the street and joined up.  I decided I could drag myself out of bed at 6:30, and then be home in time to get the boys off to school.  Even when Brennan has to leave early, I can still go, cause the big kids can watch Josh for me til I get back.  I met a trainer there and explained the post I had read to her and she said she had had a similar experience.  I agreed to meet with her once a week.  Then, I emailed a bunch of friends and told them when I would be going to the gym each morning and forwarded them the inspiring post and just flat out asked if anyone wanted to join me?  Someone did!  My friend, Jamie, wrote me immediately saying, “how did you know this is exactly what I’ve been wanting to do?”  I work so much better when I can be social. 

My answers were coming!  The Lord is so kind, the answers didn’t come overnight, I had to be patient, but they came!  After waiting for guidance for a few weeks, in a few days I had a plan, a trainer and a partner!  My first day with the trainer, Heidi, was hard.  I was excited but she pushed me hard!  As I drove home, I started to feel sick.  I crawled into the house and basically curled up into the fetal position for the rest of the day trying really hard not to throw up.  I felt a little discouraged, I have to be able to function!  After the nausea finally subsided that first day, I just had the little problem of not being able to move without extreme pain for several days!  The next time I met with her, I told her how sick I got so she eased up a bit, and I was fine til the last set of weights, and suddenly I felt sick again.  Sigh.  It didn’t last as long, but I was getting a bit discouraged.  Heidi told me to eat before I came and to use a protein powder for a recovery drink after my workouts.   Those were the only times I felt sick!  I still get sore, but I like that.  Jamie goes with me on the days I don’t workout with Heidi and we have learned so much together and it has been so much fun to have a friend to encouraging me, she is literally an answer to prayer!

Because of my fabulous trip, which I need to write about, we have only been really doing this for a few weeks, and I haven’t yet gotten in the swing of tracking food consistently.  That’s my next big goal!  I have a long way to go and am just getting started, but that feels so good! 

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Strength, Part II

There are so many things I really need to catch up on, and hopefully I will, but for now I really want to record my progress along this whole strength process.

In my first Strength post, I talked about feeling guided and directed to narrow down my year’s focus to “Strength”.  As I pondered that in the Temple, I was prompted to ask for a priesthood blessing.  When Brennan gave me that blessing he gave voice to a promise from the Lord.  I was promised the desires of my heart will be granted.  As soon as those words came out of his mouth, tears streamed down my face.  I have sought a particular blessing for many years now, it’s been a long and often frustrating quest.  The kind of journey that is two steps backwards, one step forward.  I have struggled with how open to be about this, but have felt like I need to share this experience on my blog.  I don’t think there are very many readers left which is fine with me, but I want it on the record of my life.  I want my children to know and understand that my faith is more than a weekly observance, or a cultural ritual.  This is where the rubber meets the road for me. 

This will hopefully be a series about this process, but first I feel like I need to give you a little bit of background.  I actually shared a lot of the background in a Relief Society lesson I gave a few years ago (I know, weird, huh?), so I’m going to copy here:

Body and Spirit

April 14, 2013

· I loved Conference! There were so many talks filled with treasures of wisdom and truth, and that I could listen to over and over again learning something new each time. We are so blessed to have inspired leaders who consecrate their time and lives to bring us the word of God.

· One of the talks that stood out to me was Elder Bednar's talk entitled “We Believe in Being Chaste, he said:

Elder Bednar, April 2013

“Because a physical body is so central to the Father’s plan of happiness and our spiritual development, Lucifer seeks to frustrate our progression by tempting us to use our bodies improperly. One of the ultimate ironies of eternity is that the adversary, who is miserable precisely because he has no physical body, entices us to share in his misery through the improper use of our bodies. The very tool he does not have is thus the primary target of his attempts to lure us to spiritual destruction.”

· I have thought a lot about the body and the interesting relationship we have with them. Most of the time when we talk about using our bodies improperly we think about that as it relates to our youth or even men, but what about women? Are we tempted to use our bodies improperly? Of all the groups, I think women often have the most dysfunctional relationship with our bodies.

· What are some of the ways we misuse our bodies?

◦ Extremes of unhealthiness and healthiness

◦ Obsession with physical appearance and fallacy that physical appearance = worth and identity

Sister Susan W. Tanner Oct. 2005

Likewise, we would keep the outside of our bodily temples looking clean and beautiful to reflect the sacred and holy nature of what is inside, just as the Church does with its temples. We should dress and act in ways that reflect the sacred spirit inside us.

Moderation and appropriateness should govern all of our physical desires. A loving Heavenly Father has given us physical beauties and pleasures “both to please the eye and to gladden the heart” (D&C 59:18), but with this caution: that they are “made to be used, with judgment, not to excess, neither by extortion” (D&C 59:20).

The pleasures of the body can become an obsession for some; so too can the attention we give to our outward appearance. Sometimes there is a selfish excess of exercising, dieting, makeovers, and spending money on the latest fashions (see Alma 1:27).

I am troubled by the practice of extreme makeovers. Happiness comes from accepting the bodies we have been given as divine gifts and enhancing our natural attributes, not from remaking our bodies after the image of the world. The Lord wants us to be made over—but in His image, not in the image of the world, by receiving His image in our countenances (see Alma 5:14, 19).

*Elder Holland, Oct 2005

In this same vein may I address an even more sensitive subject. I plead with you young women to please be more accepting of yourselves, including your body shape and style, with a little less longing to look like someone else. We are all different. Some are tall, and some are short. Some are round, and some are thin. And almost everyone at some time or other wants to be something they are not! But as one adviser to teenage girls said: “You can’t live your life worrying that the world is staring at you. When you let people’s opinions make you self-conscious you give away your power. … The key to feeling [confident] is to always listen to your inner self—[the real you.]” 8 And in the kingdom of God, the real you is “more precious than rubies.” 9 Every young woman is a child of destiny and every adult woman a powerful force for good. I mention adult women because, sisters, you are our greatest examples and resource for these young women. And if you are obsessing over being a size 2, you won’t be very surprised when your daughter or the Mia Maid in your class does the same and makes herself physically ill trying to accomplish it. We should all be as fit as we can be—that’s good Word of Wisdom doctrine. That means eating right and exercising and helping our bodies function at their optimum strength. We could probably all do better in that regard. But I speak here of optimum health; there is no universal optimum size.

In terms of preoccupation with self and a fixation on the physical, this is more than social insanity; it is spiritually destructive, and it accounts for much of the unhappiness women, including young women, face in the modern world. And if adults are preoccupied with appearance—tucking and nipping and implanting and remodeling everything that can be remodeled—those pressures and anxieties will certainly seep through to children. At some point the problem becomes what the Book of Mormon called “vain imaginations.” 11 And in secular society both vanity and imagination run wild. One would truly need a great and spacious makeup kit to compete with beauty as portrayed in media all around us. Yet at the end of the day there would still be those “in the attitude of mocking and pointing their fingers” as Lehi saw, 12 because however much one tries in the world of glamour and fashion, it will never be glamorous enough.

· I have thought a lot of about this, and certainly don't have this all figured out, but I did feel like I needed to share some of what I have explored on this topic. I pray you will forgive me for being quite personal.

For most of my life I have been blessed with the gift of confidence or security, that gift combined with the blessing of being raised in a happy, gospel-centered home gave me the unique position of understanding my worth. That said, I didn't think I was smarter or prettier or better than everyone I just knew that as a daughter of God, I had value and worth and that I had a specific purpose here on earth. Because of that I was able to avoid many of the painful insecurities about my body that many of my friends experienced during adolescence.

As I got older I let a few things start to chip away at that a little bit. Several years ago, it came to a head. I was in the throws of young motherhood. I was too sleep deprived and frazzled to appreciate the miraculous beauty and capacity of my body. All I could see was an overweight overworked body who felt exhausted and older by the second. I felt embarrassed and ashamed and even resentful that my weaknesses had to be so visible. Some people get to walk around and pretend they have it all figured out, but I can’t pretend that, with one look it’s apparent I have some things to work on. I found myself retreating into myself more and more. Maybe if I didn't talk or comment in church or be outgoing in anyway, maybe no one would notice that I was overweight.

One day I discovered I had become very unhappy. I don't know if you've noticed, but I'm not naturally super quiet and reserved. I wasn't being true to who I was meant to be. The adversary had used my body to fill me with insecurities, to tempt me to forget about all the good I could be doing and instead had me focused on miserable self.

I knew I needed to change. I knew I needed help. Part of me wanted to take extreme measures to lose weight and then all would be well. I had tried more moderate, down to earth approaches and had even had some success, but it was always temporary. As I read my scriptures one day, I found the beginning of my answer.

Alma 60:23

“Now I would that ye should remember that God has said that the inward vessel shall be cleansed first, and then shall the outer vessel be cleansed also.”

I knew that for me, my weight problem was tied directly to my structural flaws. We all have weaknesses. One of my weaknesses is I struggle with discipline. I have a hard time doing anything consistently including exercising and eating well. Bishop Schwab helped me understand that there is no shame in having weaknesses, because Ether teaches us that God, “give unto men weakness that they may be humble”.

I am working and praying that this weakness will someday be made a strength through the grace of my Savior, but that hasn't completely happened yet for me. In the mean time, I have been blessed as the people in the Book of Mormon where when they were in bondage:

Mosiah 24:14

14 And I will also ease the burdens which are put upon your shoulders, that even you cannot feel them upon your backs, even while you are in bondage; and this will I do that ye may stand as witnesses for me hereafter, and that ye may know of a surety that I, the Lord God, do visit my people in their afflictions.

The Lord has certainly made my burden light. I can now see that my body is a sacred blessing. I can also see that just because I have weaknesses and some of those are tied to my body, I have worth. I have much to do and much to offer and contribute to this great cause. We all do!

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